Puck from Glee....He's a Puppy of Players!

I used to think that guys like Puck from Glee were the very definition of "Playa." They were usually moderately to extremely handsome, would look me up and down like I was a ham sandwich and throw out lines like, "Hey beautiful! It must've hurt!" (You know...the angel falling from heaven one). Or, "Hey Baby! You look so good tonight! Can I get your number?"

You can always see the Puck-type Playa coming. I know some of us STILL fall for him (and always end up hurt...unless you're truly looking for a very short-lived fling), but really...We only have ourselves to blame when that happens, I say, because, in a sense, we were warned.

The Big Dog Playa is one of a totally different breed. He comes at you from the back door (not THAT door;).

The Puppy Playa approaches from the front and makes it clear what he wants and, unless you live in a land of fairy tales and make believe (if you do, don't feel bad...I lived there for many years myself), you know that he's not a keeper.

The Big Dog Playa is the one you don’t see coming. He’s the Playa that uses his weaknesses to his advantage to take us off our guard and let him in. He masquerades as a Nice Guy and makes us feel comfortable and safe enough to open our hearts because, This guy, we think, must be a keeper.

For instance, (I know this is horrible but it’s also true), an overweight, mildly attractive guy was talking to me in a bar once. He seemed to show genuine interest and I thought to myself, "Ok. He's not hot enough to be a player so he must be a nice guy." And I let my guard down. And, well, let's just say that, after that night (or, technically the next morning), I never saw him again.

Unfortunately I did not learn the first time and repeated the scenario a few more times before I caught on. (Before I caught on I'd thought that I'd done something wrong to push the guy away....See, Big Dog Playa's are geniuses! They even make you think it's YOUR fault that they don't call.)

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again…There are just as many unattractive men who are Playas as there are hot ones (Well, maybe not quite as many) Whether hot or not, what you have to watch out for is the Big Dog Playas as they take an approach that you tend to be unprepared for and, therefore, fall for more easily.

Conclusion: If a guy is nice and showing genuine interest in you and you find yourself swooning and rushing into a relationship (in your head, at least, if not in the real world),wait it out. If you’re right and he's a good guy, he’ll wait for you. If, instead, he’s a Playa, he’ll disappear. And you can save one broken heart. xxoo